Liz Phair-A-Paloozer and The List

Whoa... see what happens when you fiddle around with the new blogger stuff... A title and all... neato...

Imma gonna be outta town and computer less until Sunday. Once agan, I being my quest to stalk.. I mean my quest to convince Liz Phair to fall in love with me. And that would be ok with my wife. Liz is on my list.

You've heard of the list? The 5 celebrites you are allowed to cheat on your S.O. with... You see, it's never gonna happen. But, what if? That's where the list comes in. You and your S.O. get five people they can sleep with and it be ok because how many chances will you get to sleep with them. Liz Phair is on my list. But to be honest, I don't think I would sleep with her. It's a case of my fantasy being 1000 times better than what could ever happen in real life. The fantasy would be ruined. There's Liz and Nicole Kidman, Maura West (Carly from As The World Turns), Gina Gershon, and the babysitter (just kidding) Every year, we change ours to reflect ou current stalkings. Jeff Goldblum and David Bowie are on the wife's list. Who's on yours?

I'm thinking about getting some folks to guest post next time I check out for the weekend or for a decent stretch. Any volunteers? Not for this weekend, but the next time, if you're interested...

Yeah, it�s late. Fuck it. I like these questions. At least, I did them� So here�s Tuesday�s Friday Five:

If your life was a movie, what would the title be?
Um� Everything Grey: The Musical. What? You�re reading the screenplay�

What songs would be on the soundtrack?
Well, since it�s a musical, we could �Moulin Rouge� it and use popular music to drive the story. Songs to include:
What You Wish For � Guster (Open or Closing Credits)
What A Good Boy � Barenaked Ladies
I Could Be Your Angel � The Hatters
Hair � Hair Soundtrack
I Got Life � Hair Soundtrack
among a host of others...

Would it be a live-action film or animated? Why?
It would be a live-action musical, of course, with highly complicated choreography.

Casting: who would play you, members of your family, friends, etc?
ML � Drew Carey. It�s a comedy.
Wifey � Nicole Kidman or Debra Messing (if it�s a TV biopic)
Kid � Dewey from Malcolm in the Middle
Patrick � Eric Stoltz
Jeff � Steve Zhan (for the stupid Jeff scenes) and Donald Louge? (for the fat Jeff scenes)
Mom � Doris Roberts
Dad � Michael Caine
Sister � Helen Hunt
Bro-In-Law � Paul Reiser
Gail � Page Davis

Describe the movie preview/trailer.

It�s only happens once in a lifetime�
Clip of just-delivered new born with mother and father

A movie so powerful�
Fart sound, people passing out

So moving�
Soundbite in the rain: �You had me at hello�

So magnificent comes along�
Clip of alien ship

*record scratch*

This ain�t that flick.

*cue Liz Phair�s �Ride�*

A comedy so wacky...
Soundbite: �You win some. You lose some. Either way, you can have a beer�

So bizarre...
Clip of fantasy orgy with ML, Wifey, Liz Phair, and assorted persons

So� choreographed.

Clip of the Dance Off

This fall, you�ll laugh, you�ll cry, you�ll dance! You�ll believe that Nicole Kidman could fall for Drew Carey�

*Music changes to Guster �What You Wish For�*

From the producers of His Sister, it�s not black...
Soundbite: �Yo� Sup! For rizzle my nizzle�

It�s not white.
Clip showing very white, hairy stomach and women screaming and fleeing the hot tub

*Music changes to the pounding typmany ending of Space Odessy*

It just � is� Everything Grey: The Musical.

Feeling much better. Had a bad day at work and a feeling of dread came over me. It was all washed away by chicken wings, WWE Smackdown, and a movie shoot.

The comments were outta wack for a while and I didn't know it. But, they should be fixed now. Lemme know if there are still any problems.

4 days until the Liz-a-Tex-apalooza!

I feel like I'm about to cry and I really don't know exactly why... Hate that...

I don't understand how the heck I lost 3 lbs in the last 4 days. I haven't kept to my exercise schedule. My diet has been filled with grease and fried things. No salads. The "healthiest" thing I've eaten has been an aspargus mushroom saute I made as a side dish to spicy grilled pork chops. And, I've been eating nearly non-stop.

Don't get me wrong... Lord, I'm grateful for being rid of those 3 lbs. I just don't understand how I lost them. And makes me wonder if I'm going about the weight loss thing all wrong. I ate a whole friggin' pizza for gripes sake! Grilled Chicken Alfredo from Papa John's. That can't be good...

Then again, perhaps my metobolism has finally jump started and is doing its job. I have been quite hungry alot lately. I mean like 2 hours after eating a loosen-your-belt meal. But you know, it feels pretty good to say I've lost 25lbs.