There's probably a good reason why I have neglected blogging for a long time now. Time being a major factor. Interest being another. But, when I really think about, perhaps it really boils down to... how can I explain it? Let's try it this way...
There's a song by Blue October called, "Ugly Side" on their History for Sale album (incredible songwriting on this album, by the way) and the chorus goes, "I only want you to see/My favorite part of me/And not my ugly side."
How true. There's many things over the years of maintaining this blog that I haven't shared. A lot of things I might be too embarrassed to put out there, or maybe ashamed to admit, too. And part of my struggle keeping this sight going is remaining honest with you, the reader. Am I really being honest "living online," if I don't speak about the bad things in my life, too? Life ain't always a bowl of cherries...
Granted, if you go through the archives, you'll find quite a few stories of me not living up to my expectations, or perhaps a story or two that ends with you being disappointed in how I acted or handled something. But, I'm really starting to think that for the past two years or so, the image I have put forth here is not necessarily a completely honest one. Even not posting kinda says something, right? And the whole point for me is to be completely honest, showing the good and bad. Isn't it a bit false, otherwise?
Over the existence of Everything Grey, it has morphed from a journal-type thing to a documentation of my ongoing spiritual journey, showing how the Christian path has changed my life. This has become my living testimony. And, I think to truly be a Witness, the whole story has to be told - a story that probably doesn't end until I die (and on some level maybe not then). Somewhere in my reasons for blogging is the hope that someone perhaps stumbles across this site, reads the ups and downs, and maybe that influences them into looking up this Christianity thing and learns that it is really about a fixing a broken relationship between ourselves and God.
One of the biggest principles of Christianity is giving your life over to God and humbling yourself before Him. I've been quite stubborn since I've dropped writing here and I know that I haven't been living up to that principle. Today, I'm just admitting it. I could say that I haven't had the time to dedicate to... read the Bible more, pray more, talk to God more. And, some might probably agree... But the ugly truth is I'm just starting to recognize that I'm running away from God when I should be running to embrace Him.
That is not to say that I no longer have faith in God, or don't believe in Him. I do. I just haven't been an very active participant in our relationship for a while. And the ugly truth is, I'm not sure when I'll get more active again.
If there's a problem, the first step to healing is admitting there is a problem in the first place. I admit there is a general lack of active participation in my relationship with God. That's step one, but if I'm being honest, I'm not sure when I'm going to take step 2. I'm not exactly positive what that step is just yet.
I'm not even sure if I'm going to continue writing here. But remember, Christianity for me is about the journey to get to Heaven and less so actually getting there. Once you're there, you're there. But until I'm there, yes, I am tempted. Yes, I do give in to temptations. The journey is not perfect and neither am I.
I just ask for patience and forgiveness.
Friday, July 30, 2010
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Simple Explanation of Faith
This might be the most simplest explanation of Faith in God I have run across. Don't know where it originated, but the place I found it (the comment's section of Fark of all places), said they were paraphrasing...
I think that pretty much sums it up...
A poor man comes out onto the porch every day and says, "Dear God, please save my family from hunger. All of my money goes to paying for this house." Every day, his atheist neighbor yells over, "You're a fool! There is no God!"
One day, as the man comes out to pray, he sees several bags of groceries lying there. He says, "Thank you God for providing for my family. I knew you'd hear my prayers." At that point, the atheist neighbor jumps out and says, "Ha! I bought those groceries! There is no God!"
The poor man then says, "Dear God, thank you for not only providing for my family, but getting the atheist to pay for it!"
Moral of the story: Perception is reality
I think that pretty much sums it up...
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Hell Freezing Over
There's a joke in South Louisiana that goes like this:
It took 43 years for the New Orleans Saints to reach this point, but they are finally here. And, the son of their most beloved icon stands in their way. That's pretty much how the Saints have rolled through out their franchise history. One disappointment after another.
For example, when Hartley lined up to kick the field goal that would ultimately send them to Miami, I can guaranty there was not one Saints fan who thought he would make it. After 43 years of, "Really, WTF?" we Saints fans are used to being let down. So, when Hartley split the uprights, before the raucous cheering, there was a brief half-second of silence. We had to make sure what we saw actually happened and we weren't dreaming.
This is what Saints fans are used to. A few years ago, we were playing the Jaguars and the playoffs were on the line. Win and get in, lose and no playoffs. Down 20-13 with :07 seconds left...
That's right. They pull off an incredible hook-n-ladder-esque finale only to have the kicker shank the PAT and lose. We haven't trusted a kicker since. How we missed ol' Morten Andersen, aka: The Saints Franchise all-time scoring leader... a field gold kicker is our all-time scoring leader. He last kicked for the Saints in 1994.
But that's the past and the future is now. And the Black and Gold boys are heading to the Super Bowl to face the Colts.
Growing up around New Orleans and now calling Indianapolis home, I perhaps have one of most unique perspectives on the Super Bowl XLIV. So, people are wondering who I am rooting for... Fair question.
In all honesty, I am going to happy no matter who wins. Though, my level of elation will be 1000x higher if the Saints win. Heck, I'll probably cry if they win. But,to be perfectly frank, while I will be rooting for the Saints, I expect the Colts will win. Here's why:
From where I sit, these are the two best teams in the NFL today. They are both #1 seeds. They both have a great quarterback. They both have outstanding O-Lines and D-Lines. They are so evenly matched, in my opinion, that you have to look at the unknowns.
The game is going to come down the following:
1. Quarterback protection - which ever team can get to the quarterback early and often is going to be in the great position to win. Sacks don't matter so much as rushing the QB into mistakes. As quickly as Drew Brees gets rid of the ball and as nasty as the Saints have been getting to the QB, I have to give the edge to the Saints here. ADVANTAGE: SAINTS
2. Turnovers - which ever team wins the turnover battle will have an edge. There's a reason why the Vikings had fumblitis. It's because the Saints don't just tackle the man with the ball, they swing their arm back and punch the ball out of the runners hand. The Vikings had 6 fumbles and only 1 was not caused by the Saints. That was the awkward hand-off between Favre and Peterson. The Colts caused 30 takeaways compared to the Saints 46 (regular and post-season combined). ADVANTAGE: SAINTS
3. Special Teams - Field position is everything. Percy Harvin never got a chance to run one back on the Saints for one reason - the ball was always unreturnable. The Saints kicked it out of the end zone most of night and the Vikings started alot of their drives with a long field. Reggie Bush is always a threat to at least put the Saints in good field position... unless he tries to be a hero and doesn't call a fair catch. Still... ADVANTAGE: SAINTS
4. Luck - Which way the ball bounces, how the refs call penalties, who wins the coin flip... I think the teams are so evenly matched that luck will be a big factor. ADVANTAGE: Hard to say since luck comes in the game. But, is there a more blessed team than the SAINTS?
So, there you have it. Colts are going to win. Wait, you say? Didn't you just explain why the Saints have many advantages against the Colts, you say?
Yep. I sure did. You see, as I said, I'm a Saints fan. I'm used to heart-wrenching disappointment. While I will be rooting for the Saints to win, I completely expect the Colts to break New Orleans' hearts... Probably involving a last second field goal.
But until then, WHO DAT? WHO DAT? WHO DAY SAY GONNA BEAT DEM SAINTS? WHO DAT? GEAUX SAINTS!
Boudreaux and Thibodaux both died and ended up in hell. The devil greets them and welcomes them to their everlasting torture.
"Is it too hot for you," asks Satan.
"Brah, we from South Luzianna. We used to da heat," Boudreaux told him. So, Satan cranks up the heat in hell.
"How about now? Is it too hot for you," he asks the cajuns. They both laugh.
"It jus' 'bout as hot as my gumbo wit da Tabasco sauce. Dis ain't hot," Thibodaux told him.
Frustrated, Satan gets an idea and turns the temperature down so low it starts snowing in Hell.
Boudreaux and Thibodaux start jumping up and down, screaming and hollering with glee. Satan doesn't understand their reaction, so he says, "I cranked the heat up and you loved it, so I froze the place and now your celebrating?!? What gives?"
They, continuing their celebration, replied, "THE SAINTS JUST WON THE SUPER BOWL!!!"
It took 43 years for the New Orleans Saints to reach this point, but they are finally here. And, the son of their most beloved icon stands in their way. That's pretty much how the Saints have rolled through out their franchise history. One disappointment after another.
For example, when Hartley lined up to kick the field goal that would ultimately send them to Miami, I can guaranty there was not one Saints fan who thought he would make it. After 43 years of, "Really, WTF?" we Saints fans are used to being let down. So, when Hartley split the uprights, before the raucous cheering, there was a brief half-second of silence. We had to make sure what we saw actually happened and we weren't dreaming.
This is what Saints fans are used to. A few years ago, we were playing the Jaguars and the playoffs were on the line. Win and get in, lose and no playoffs. Down 20-13 with :07 seconds left...
That's right. They pull off an incredible hook-n-ladder-esque finale only to have the kicker shank the PAT and lose. We haven't trusted a kicker since. How we missed ol' Morten Andersen, aka: The Saints Franchise all-time scoring leader... a field gold kicker is our all-time scoring leader. He last kicked for the Saints in 1994.
But that's the past and the future is now. And the Black and Gold boys are heading to the Super Bowl to face the Colts.
Growing up around New Orleans and now calling Indianapolis home, I perhaps have one of most unique perspectives on the Super Bowl XLIV. So, people are wondering who I am rooting for... Fair question.
In all honesty, I am going to happy no matter who wins. Though, my level of elation will be 1000x higher if the Saints win. Heck, I'll probably cry if they win. But,to be perfectly frank, while I will be rooting for the Saints, I expect the Colts will win. Here's why:
From where I sit, these are the two best teams in the NFL today. They are both #1 seeds. They both have a great quarterback. They both have outstanding O-Lines and D-Lines. They are so evenly matched, in my opinion, that you have to look at the unknowns.
The game is going to come down the following:
1. Quarterback protection - which ever team can get to the quarterback early and often is going to be in the great position to win. Sacks don't matter so much as rushing the QB into mistakes. As quickly as Drew Brees gets rid of the ball and as nasty as the Saints have been getting to the QB, I have to give the edge to the Saints here. ADVANTAGE: SAINTS
2. Turnovers - which ever team wins the turnover battle will have an edge. There's a reason why the Vikings had fumblitis. It's because the Saints don't just tackle the man with the ball, they swing their arm back and punch the ball out of the runners hand. The Vikings had 6 fumbles and only 1 was not caused by the Saints. That was the awkward hand-off between Favre and Peterson. The Colts caused 30 takeaways compared to the Saints 46 (regular and post-season combined). ADVANTAGE: SAINTS
3. Special Teams - Field position is everything. Percy Harvin never got a chance to run one back on the Saints for one reason - the ball was always unreturnable. The Saints kicked it out of the end zone most of night and the Vikings started alot of their drives with a long field. Reggie Bush is always a threat to at least put the Saints in good field position... unless he tries to be a hero and doesn't call a fair catch. Still... ADVANTAGE: SAINTS
4. Luck - Which way the ball bounces, how the refs call penalties, who wins the coin flip... I think the teams are so evenly matched that luck will be a big factor. ADVANTAGE: Hard to say since luck comes in the game. But, is there a more blessed team than the SAINTS?
So, there you have it. Colts are going to win. Wait, you say? Didn't you just explain why the Saints have many advantages against the Colts, you say?
Yep. I sure did. You see, as I said, I'm a Saints fan. I'm used to heart-wrenching disappointment. While I will be rooting for the Saints to win, I completely expect the Colts to break New Orleans' hearts... Probably involving a last second field goal.
But until then, WHO DAT? WHO DAT? WHO DAY SAY GONNA BEAT DEM SAINTS? WHO DAT? GEAUX SAINTS!
Saturday, January 23, 2010
Resolution Broken
So, yeah... That cooking resolution really didn't go as planned. In fact, unless I count bacon and eggs on the griddle, I'm not sure I've cooked since then. Though, I guess having to deal with a car being in the shop twice in 3 weeks for the same reason has much to do with it. And, the sad news of a good friend from college passing away. So, yeah... haven't really felt much up to it.
Still, I'm not giving up. I'm going to do this... Really, at some point... Soon.
And now for some random thoughts that have nothing to do with each other and probably nothing you are thinking they are related to:
- GEAUX SAINTS!
- Haven't been to church in a few months. I haven't been clicking with the congregation. Still very much a Christian in my beliefs, though I do need to participate with God more.
- Discipline. Discipline. Discipline.
Still, I'm not giving up. I'm going to do this... Really, at some point... Soon.
And now for some random thoughts that have nothing to do with each other and probably nothing you are thinking they are related to:
- GEAUX SAINTS!
- Haven't been to church in a few months. I haven't been clicking with the congregation. Still very much a Christian in my beliefs, though I do need to participate with God more.
- Discipline. Discipline. Discipline.
Monday, January 04, 2010
Resolutions
Funny thing about New Year's Resolutions... Sometime after Christmas and before New Years' Eve, I thought of a really good resolution. Something that I could do without worrying about breaking it. Then, I promptly forgot what it was... Still don't know.
So, over the weekend, I thought of a new one. Lately, I have really been into cooking. Not just cooking, but learning what flavors go well with other flavors. What foods taste good together. So, I figure my resolution is to cook a brand new, never before tried recipe once a week. The goal is to learn more about food, cooking and creating recipes. I firmly believe that a recipe is only a guide and not something to be followed to a tea. So, I think this will be a fun experience.
Over the weekend, I made a marinade for some t-bone steaks. Click here for the recipe.
Now, right of the bat, you should know a few things about my experience with this recipe. First, I thought we had lemon juice, but we were out. So, I substituted lime juice. Also, substituted olive oil for the vegetable juice. Second, I didn't use flank steaks, but T-bones. They marinaded for nearly 24 hours. Third, when it came time to grill these suckers, it was about 5 or 6 degrees outside, which was fun. I think the cold affected the charcoal's heat. The grill only got up to about 225F. Lastly, Scooby was not looking like himself all day. When it came time to grill the steaks, I had to pull them off earlier than I wanted and bring him to the Vet ER. He is feeling better. Not sure what they problem was. Likely a combination of overweight and a viral bug that zapped his energy. When we got back, we finished the steaks on a griddle in the kitchen.
Despite all of the above, the steaks were very tender and flavorful. The substitution of lime didn't have an adverse effect on the flavor. For me, the unfortunate part was the too-cold charcoal and the vet trip made it difficult to sear the meat properly. That led to an under-colored finished product, yet still was tasty.
Overall, it was enjoyed by all. So, in that respect, it was a success.
Don't know what my next recipe is going to be. But, I have lots of source materials: from Gordon Ramsey to Betty Crocker cookbooks and the plentiful internet. I'm sure I'll find something fun. The trick for this is to plan ahead and shop for the right ingredients. If I can do that, I'll be able to keep this resolution.
So, over the weekend, I thought of a new one. Lately, I have really been into cooking. Not just cooking, but learning what flavors go well with other flavors. What foods taste good together. So, I figure my resolution is to cook a brand new, never before tried recipe once a week. The goal is to learn more about food, cooking and creating recipes. I firmly believe that a recipe is only a guide and not something to be followed to a tea. So, I think this will be a fun experience.
Over the weekend, I made a marinade for some t-bone steaks. Click here for the recipe.
Now, right of the bat, you should know a few things about my experience with this recipe. First, I thought we had lemon juice, but we were out. So, I substituted lime juice. Also, substituted olive oil for the vegetable juice. Second, I didn't use flank steaks, but T-bones. They marinaded for nearly 24 hours. Third, when it came time to grill these suckers, it was about 5 or 6 degrees outside, which was fun. I think the cold affected the charcoal's heat. The grill only got up to about 225F. Lastly, Scooby was not looking like himself all day. When it came time to grill the steaks, I had to pull them off earlier than I wanted and bring him to the Vet ER. He is feeling better. Not sure what they problem was. Likely a combination of overweight and a viral bug that zapped his energy. When we got back, we finished the steaks on a griddle in the kitchen.
Despite all of the above, the steaks were very tender and flavorful. The substitution of lime didn't have an adverse effect on the flavor. For me, the unfortunate part was the too-cold charcoal and the vet trip made it difficult to sear the meat properly. That led to an under-colored finished product, yet still was tasty.
Overall, it was enjoyed by all. So, in that respect, it was a success.
Don't know what my next recipe is going to be. But, I have lots of source materials: from Gordon Ramsey to Betty Crocker cookbooks and the plentiful internet. I'm sure I'll find something fun. The trick for this is to plan ahead and shop for the right ingredients. If I can do that, I'll be able to keep this resolution.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)