Let's not get into the specifics of exactly why the kid and I saw "From Justin To Kelly." Let's just get to the point...

I guess it's not really a shocker that "From Justin To Kelly" pretty much defines "suckage." The biggest shock is that it coulda beena contenda. That is, it had potential. Unfortunately, everyone involved thought it best to capitalize on the American Idols popularity by rushing this piece of crap into production. I really think that is this movie's major problem. Well, maybe the major problem is the script, which is a direct result of rushing the flick into theaters. It doesn't come as a surprise that the person who wrote this drivel also has "Spice World" on their resume. Seriously, everything else about this movie was suitable. But, you can only do so much with the words you're given.

I did have a problem with "freaky nipple guy." That's what I called him. There's this buffed up background dancer dude with some seriously fucked up nips. They are bigger than dubloons and are dark brown on a rather tanless body. The image is rather hypnotic. You can't help but stare at them. I found myself counting how many times this oddity appeared on the screen. Turns out, he's a bartender at one club at night and spends his days dancing on the beach. Of course during Spring Break, that's what everyone does... dance on the beach.

The musical aspect of "From Justin To Kelly" is ok, except for the horrid redition of K. C. and the Sunshine Band's "That's The Way (uh Huh) I Like It." The songs flow out of the dialouge rather easily and you almost get the idea in real life people break out in song (Well, in my reality, they do anyway). But, the settings of some of the songs are way outta wack. Why sing about how "I'm finally holding you in my arms" and how great that feels if your A) in a boat with your love interest driving you around the ocean and B) YOU'RE NOT HOLDING THEM IN YOUR ARMS.

Can someone please tell Kelly to hire a best costumer? Honey, nothing you wore was very flattering, except for perhaps, that red top and the green pants. And that top in the end looked like someone tied a couple of silk scarfs together. Ick!

This could have been a fun beach movie. But it's not. Kids, if you wanna see a fun beach movie, rent something with Frankie and Annette.

Best Line of the Movie: Some Random Thug to Justin: (paraphased) "What's your problem, Sideshow Bob?"

The Headache Chronicles

8am - Having to work the late shift, the day begins rather late. I arise from my slumber with the snooze alarm and get dressed for my daily walk.

8:50am - Talking my good ol' time to get ready, I venture out of the apartment to begin a brisk 2-mile walk.

9:10am - While walking, I comtemplate the day ahead. Thoughts soon turn to what work has instore for the week. I realize that the department head and assistant are both out on vacation, as well as, the other producer I'll working the late shift for. It hits me that it will only be me, the intern, and Miss Mangagement in the office for most of the week. Dammit.

9:11am - Headache begins.

9:50am - Back at home, I shower and get ready for work. Headache grows with quick breakfast.

10:25am - Drive to work. I notice that the closer I get to the office gates, the bigger the stabbing pains are.

10:50am - Arrive at work. I notice that people are here, just not at their desks.

11am - While sitting at my desk working, Miss Management sits at desk and starts normal work discussions.

11:00:37am - Headache intesifies tenfold.

11:10am - Swallow two 200mg ibuprofen tablets with a tall glass of water.

12pm - Seeking some relief, I take my hair out of the ponytail. Nothing happens. Pain still throbs.

12:10pm - Miss Management leaves for lunch. Headache subsides slightly.

1pm - Attend daily meeting. Head feels like Hulk smashing brain.

1:18pm - Leave the building to grab some lunch.

1:20pm - Notice that head has stopped hurting even with hair in ponytail.

1:30pm - While in line for food, the pain has completely stopped.

1:40pm - Arrive back in building. Pain resumes. Notice Miss Management isn't back from lunch. Not surprised.

1:50pm - Log into Blogger for this post. Head is pounding.

Update:
5:45pm - Miss Management goes home.

6:10pm - Headache almost completely gone.

Gee, I wonder what the problem could be???

When you get depressed, really deep down blue, you start to doubt just about everything. And I do mean everything. You doubt your self-worth, your life, your choices, your relationships. You distance yourself from family and friends so not to bother them with your troubles, even though deep down you hope they notice and do something about it. The beauty of severe mood swings is that it doesn't take much to swing towards the positive.

I'd been feeling pretty down on life lately. Lots of doubts which I don't care to talk about because they don't really matter. The important thing is that I'm on a positive swing all because of Goldie Hawn. You see, I was given "Wildcats" on DVD by my wife for Father's Day. Yeah, it's a comedy and has some great laughs. Bonus points for the football. An extra point or two for noticing a bad edit where you see Wesley Snipes in all his maniless for a few frames. But, the movie itself didn't cause the good swing. No, it was the thought that this was the first movie my wife and I shared together over 10 years ago.

When you get depressed, really down down blue, you notice little things. You notice you hit the snooze a little more. You notice less eye contact with people. You notice a bad edit in a movie where you see Wesley Snipes's and his third leg for a few frames. The beauty of severe mood swings is that just a little thought or memory can bring you back to the positive.

Going out of town for a few days. The Mission: Make Liz Phair fall in love with me. Considering it's highly unlikely the mission will be successful, I'll have to console my heart and loins with seeing her live in concert in Austin.

Here's one of my favorite Liz Phair songs. It's the first one on her Whip-smart album.

Chopsticks

I met him at a party and he told me how to drive him home.
He said he liked to do it backwards. I said that's just fine with me.
That way we can fuck and watch TV.

It was four a.m. and the light was gray like it always is in paperbacks.
He asked if I liked playing jacks. I told him that I was good to sixes,
But all hell broke loose after that.

I told him that I knew Julia Roberts when I was twelve at summer camp.
We didn't say anything after that. I dropped him off and I drove on home
'Cause secretly, I'm timid.

I don't mind the "Tamyra" search hits so much, not even the "hot lesbian action" hits... But "catfights in 7th grade"... Dude, that's just friggin' nasty! Though, I never would have stumbled upon this post at Spoonfeeding, so maybe thanks are in order...

Sugar-free Jello IS NOT a suitable substitution to satisfy your chocolate cravings...

Today was a horrible day until God allowed me to see that glorious sunset. It is an honor to know that I was one of the priveledged few to view that serene scene. Hues of pink, orange, blue, white, and omnious grey all combined in the sky's palette to create a brillant moment. The beauty may have lasted only 15 minutes, yet I feel calmier, clearer and more at peace for having that time. Suddenly, the day wasn't about the hassles and the fights. Suddenly, the day was simply wonderful.